an open letter

dear men in my life,

i don't even know how to begin. it seems like the last few years have afforded me countless opportunities to witness crimes against the very soul of masculinity. and i want to say something to you, because i have heard stories, i have read theory, and i'm devastated.

we live in a world that tells men they have to conquer, even to kill, in order to prove their worth. sometimes it's figurative, but it's always insidious. we live in a world where being a man means valuing ideas over people, control over compassion, and power above all. as far as engaging the world, a perverse hybrid of hedonism and stoicism is the way to go. oh, and women are meant to be used. and it's not just soldiers who hear this... it's kind of all of us.

there are brands of feminism that are trying to sell the same package to women, because equality means being equally powerful. because power is the only currency we deal in.

i'm profoundly shaken.

and i wanted to say... look, i'm not blind to the real battles we all face, as individuals and corporately. i'm just questioning our strategy, which seems to be self-destruction. and i want you to know that what i value so very much about you is not your domination of others, but your self-giving love for those around you. and when you use whatever power you've stumbled upon to raise up the poor, the weak, and the broken, you inspire me to hope.

and hope seems to be what we need right now.

p.s. craig, you told me first. i can never thank you enough.