lsat 101: conditional statements

welcome to lsat 101!

today we'll be covering conditional statements. consider the following:

if it rains, i will bring an umbrella.
this means that if you see me without an umbrella, it must not have rained. let's symbolize that:

rain -> umbrella
~umbrella -> ~rain

now this one:

"only experts can recognize a phony work of art."
that means that *if* you can recognize a phony, *then* you must be an expert.

recognize phony -> expert
~expert -> ~recognize phony

now, if you're like me, you watch "glee."
(like m -> watch "glee")

and this week they sang "only the good die young"
if you're even more like me, you immediately think of the conditional statement this billy joel tune implies:

die young -> good
~good -> ~die young

three gifts

i eaves-read another person's book on the subway today and was inspired by this question: "what three values would you most want to instill in your children?"

the first one that sprang to mind was generosity. dr. mark greene's dying words to his daughter, rachel, were: "be generous. with your time. with your love. with your life... be generous, always."



i kind of want those to be my first words to my children.

curiosity: the world is a wonder, and when i catch myself less than in awe, i know i am in trouble. i don't want my children to be often in that kind of trouble.

integrity: even when it's all you've got, it can keep you warm at night.

what would you give?

capital/capitol

things you need to know about me, if you don't already:

1 - i'm insanely into "the west wing."
2 - the only time i've ever been to washington dc, i hung out with the older sissy, but never saw the sights.
3 - united airlines flies to heathrow through dc.
4 - i don't know how to sight-see by myself. it's hard to stay motivated and to know what to do... and i always wish i had someone to talk to about what i see.
5 - my thesis work revolves around the vietnam war.

with some help from my expedia-expert (i.e. dad), a 13-hour layover was planned. the benefit of this particular trip was that it was so short that it could only allow for a whirlwind tour. in other words, i had no choice but to stay motivated. it also demanded some triage.

i focused on the national archives, the lincoln memorial, and the vietnam war memorial. i also broke down and got a reader card at the library of congress. ("broke down" because they really discourage getting the card unless you intend to do research. in all fairness, i would have done so if i had the time.)

apart from the coincidence of seeing an enlisted soldier at the vietnam war memorial, my favourite thing was discovering that one of my tour bus drivers (taking advantage of the freedom to hop-on-hop-off, i met four different ones) was a vietnam vet. he was in grad school and got a student deferment, but then he ran out of money. so he enlisted and flew fighter planes! then he moved to d.c. in '73. i know vets abound, especially in the states, and especially when it comes to this particular war... but it was still kinda neat.

where the brilliant ideas are...

in case it wasn't intuitively obvious from my last post, i've been spending a whole lot of time working at a coffee shop lately. namely, a starbucks at a certain chapters near my house.

sometimes i feel guilty about being here: at first, i would get a (vanilla rooibos, loose-leaf in a bag!) tea in the morning, ask to have it topped up with more hot water a few hours later, then have a snack or lunch, and finally a (vanilla rooibos, loose-leaf in a bag!) tea latte in the afternoon. then i started bringing my lunch and snack from home. they let me stay, which i really appreciate. (for all i know, the staff is just uncomfortable asking people to please spend more than $7 if they're going to hang out all day and use their power outlets.) in any case, it works out well for me, but i feel awful when people are lookin' for a place to sit.

incidentally, even $7 a day (plus transit) isn't cheap. if you click on the ads on the left, you can help me pay for my "office"! :) i'll even put a little sign on my table that says, "paid for, in part, by..." i swear i will.

the thing is, i get work done at an alarming rate when i'm here! there are fewer distractions and i only have internet access for 2 hours. plus, the very act of getting up and out of the house helps put me in the right frame of mind for productivity. (fact: i could never be self-employed.) listening to "glee" constantly also seems to help. it's predictable (there are only twenty tracks, at this point) and cheerful. my mom actually describes the show as my way of recovering from hours and hours of being immersed in the gory details of the vietnam war and the infuriating selfishness of certain corners of the mennonite and united churches.

she may have a point. it's hard to be too upset about tiger cages when you're listening to this:


what helps you get work done?

"you *have* to be kidding!"

too many mornings, those are the first words out of my mouth. it's been taking me hours to fall asleep at night and forever to wake up in the morning. my dreams have been vivid and occasionally emotionally exhausting, so i often walk through my day like a zombie. the dumb kind of zombie. the kind that thinks cauliflowers are brains. [(c) seth grahame-smith]

last night, as i lay in bed, between playing "6 degrees of separation"* and realizing that i have only two weeks to complete my first draft of my thesis, it was very hard not to wonder what my life will be like a year from now. will i be in toronto? will i be more sure of myself? will i be more disciplined? will i - dare i ask? - be happy?

anyway, i think my cell phone is beginning to resent the abuse. does anyone know a surefire way to convince the body that sleep is for nighttime and alert wakefulness is for daytime?

* for instance: at his audition for "glee," chris colfer sang "mr. cellophane" from "chicago." his character, kurt hummel, also sang that song in the pilot. how can i connect "glee" and "chicago"?

glee - jane lynch - julie and julia - stanley tucci - it could happen to you - nicholas cage - the rock - sean connery - entrapment - catherine zeta-jones chicago

nb: this was before i knew that jane lynch was in talladega nights: the ballad of ricky bobby. this piece of information would have simplified things considerably, since john c. reilly is mr. cellophane himself.

joyful, joyful...

i know this is terribly novel, but i may be addicted to glee. this undoubtedly comes as a shock, given that i cry *every* time i watch sister act. (granted, this show is more in the style of the sequel.)

anywho, it's superclever, the music is sweet, and jane lynch is a genius. i especially dig that rachel works out to "break my stride" because, as some of you may remember, i do, too.

additionally, i need to work out a normal sleep schedule.

and so, goodnight unto you all.

10

this song popped up on my ipod the other day and i was struck by how well it described the way i felt about god, particularly toward the end of those ten years...



these parts especially resonated:

i sang your songs, i danced your dance
i gave your friends all a chance
but putting up with them
wasn't worth never having you*...

well, if i was in your position
i'd put down all my ammunition
i'd wonder why'd it'd taken me so long

but lord knows that i'm not you
and if i was, i wouldn't be so cruel
'cause waitin' on love ain't so easy to do

(*not in a blanket sense. but, yes, this resonates profoundly)

the music video makes me wonder whether i'd like to turn back time. and in many ways, i would. my life would be very different if i hadn't begun attending church in 1997. my career path, my family life, my friendships. but maybe i'm better for having arrived here the way i did. maybe it's ok to go down some painful paths, because otherwise you'd always be wondering about them. plus, i have met some wonderful people and learned some crucial lessons along the way.

in fact, i know i'm more compassionate to those who disagree with me than i used to be. maybe that just comes with growing up and caring less about "winning." or maybe spending ten years thinking a lot about character and integrity and sacrifice and kindness and truth and beauty has been good for my soul. so it's not so much about regret as... cutting my losses.

d. and i are speaking again, which is to say that he's arguing with me again. and i now realize what my sister was talking about when she said, "all christians seem to care about is whether i'm a christian." again, a blanket statement, so not quite accurate. but still... it hints at something real. and silly. and even a little painful.

there are a few things i'm an evangelist for: lars and the real girl, asparagus, chick peas, the west wing, toronto's ravines, and some social justice issues. but i hope i always, always care more about the people i'm talking to than i do about being right.

n is for nightmare

over the last few months, my dreams have gotten more vivid. they've always been pretty weird, but they've become more detailed and memorable. and emotional.

a couple of nights ago, i couldn't sleep because of a bad storm - my windows are pretty lousy, and the wind made an enormous racket. i lay awake for about two hours, holding wesley close and fighting to find slumber again... but i also had a lot on my mind, and the coincidence of storms within and without left me sleepless.

since then my sleep's been quite shallow. (i know this because elements of "the west wing" have snuck in, which means i could hear the dvds playing on my laptop.) i've decided to avoid naps from now on because they leave me grouchy and throw off my clock even more.

last night, i dreamt that a bunch of us were being held at gunpoint in my parents' house. i managed to sneak away and kept trying to call 911 as i ran down the snowy road toward the main street. i misdialed. my fingers fumbled, my cellphone locked. it rang and rang and no one picked up. i begged the people i passed to get help, but they waved me off.

i was simply overcome with helplessness and anxiety. how overcome? well, this morning i found mystery bruises. also, one of my teeth is slightly chipped. my desire for genuine rest is taking a turn for the desperate.

she's talking in her sleep -
it's keepin' me awake,
and anna begins to toss and turn,
and every word is nonsense, but i understand...
~ counting crows, "anna begins"

k is for kisses

cannot *believe* i've only been awake for thirteen hours... it's been a dense day.

i) a group session for our "carving out your discipline" position papers: two hours of peer review, with ginger cake! i still don't know how my work contributes to humanity, exactly.

ii) research on jeanne guyon: this led to general commentaries on the phenomenon of mysticism among women, which in turn led to simone de beauvoir's chapter on women mystics in "second sex." there was a great deal to process there, and i'll be reflecting about it here when i can. but, to start with: i'm not as healthy as i wish i were.

iii) cornerstone: walking home with charles, cleaning for an inspection, making a birthday card, teaching theresa how to use excel, decorating, drinking on the job, having a party, coming thisclose to trying guitar hero, almost making a med error (i blame the wine!), and helping bev get ready for bed.

iv) so tired. didn't bother going home... came straight from cornerstone to charbonneau, to sleep. trying to decide if i can stay awake long enough to laugh at jon.

vi) by the way, brian and beverly both kissed me today. plus, brian took my hand and sat me on the couch and passed me his jungle book colouring pad and some crayons. the glittery and metallic crayons are especially wonderful.

the crayons weren't really the point, though. it was the kisses that made my world all sparkly.

i is for irony

there are episodes of the west wing that are inextricably linked to episodes in my own life. i started watching the show during the summer before the second season. the first episode i ever saw was celestial navigation. i missed the first hour of the brilliant season premiere (in the shadow of two gunmen), and came home waiting for the second hour to finish, so i could watch the tape from beginning to end. that was my first year in university, and i never missed a night. often, my family would watch with me.

between the second and third seasons, along with the tragedy of 9/11, my family imploded. i remember watching isaac and ishmael at the mcarthurs', shortly after we had moved in. having people over to our apartment to watch the women of qumar. calling ildiko and screaming in her ear after commencement.

between the fourth and fifth seasons, i moved to alberta. while sleeping on the couch in front of angie's computer, i dreamt about zoey bartlet's abduction. i stopped watching on a regular basis after aaron sorkin and thomas schlamme left the show, but read about it once in a while. finally, in 2007, i bought all seven seasons on dvd. i'm often in the process of rewatching them in order.

the last episode i watched with my family was two cathedrals. i don't remember who else was there, but i know dad was. it's a very emotional episode: in the wake of a devestating personal loss, president bartlet reveals to the world that he has had an undisclosed disease for eight years. in the mix, he ponders re-election and questions his faith.

two scenes especially stand out: first, bartlet standing in the midst of national cathedral, cursing God in latin. second, bartlet making his way from the white house, post-revelation, to the press conference. dire straits plays "brothers in arms" in the background, and the faces of the staffers remind us how much is riding on the question he will undoubtedly be asked by reporters: will you be seeking a second term?

my dad and i debated the pseudo-cliffhanger in may. by the time it was resolved in late september, we were no longer watching together.

the reasons why my family imploded weren't simple. and the last eight years have been a long process of healing without talking about it. at first, some of the reasons just weren't a point of friction anymore. then, surprisingly, some of the reasons simply ceased to exist.

we were actually talking about that on the way home from dinner last night. just me and dad. i said, "i'm not sure how it happened, and i didn't plan on it happening." we pulled into the driveway and he elbowed me playfully. "well, i'm glad it did."

i don't know if i'm glad it happened. i don't really know what's happening at all. but as we watched "the west wing" later that night - the few episodes i'd brought with me simply because they were next - i was consumed by the irony of watching bartlet curse in latin and listening to dire straits... with my dad. again.

these mist covered mountains
are a home now for me
but my home is the lowlands
and always will be
some day you'll return to
your valleys and your farms
and you'll no longer burn
to be brothers in arms
~ dire straits

p.s. i gave dad that irony shirt a while ago... he has iron issues.

hooker's delight

ever since amy introduced me to puttanesca, this vegetarian and easily vegan pasta dish has been a favourite of mine. recently, two of the food blogs i enjoy have featured it: first, stacey offered her recipe: a combination of olive oil, anchovies, capers, garlic, black olives, and canned tomatoes over linguine or penne. then, not to be outdone, lori lynn posted her tweaks on stacey's take: she adds basil and red chili pepper flakes in the early stage and tops the pasta-and-sauce combo with a scoop of ricotta cheese, rather than parm.

while i'm trying to break out of my bizarre loyalty to original recipes, i really do love that amy's puttanesca also includes green olives, golden raisins, and toasted pine nuts. the bigger issue, however, is the whole anchovy fiasco.

first off, isn't it a little weird that these fishies *dissolve* when you cook them?! secondly, anchovies have a reputation: from sleepover friends to the babysitters club (though apparently kristy liked them!) to friends to the teenage mutant ninja turtles, so much of pop culture has told me they're gross. but, hey, come to think of it, mr. beastly was wrong about brussel sprouts - there *are* ways to make them so super tasty! - so maybe there's room for benefit of the doubt when it comes to wee salty fishes, too.

so, despite all that the strategic brainwashing and my aforementioned devotion to (my) traditions, i'm tentatively confident (is that contradictory?) that adding anchovies will be ok. afterall, as a kid i loved sardines. and there was also some kind of fish paste that we just spread on slices of bread? so this is prolly worth a try. maybe rather than making "lady of the night" pasta for lunch today, i'll wait until i can get to the grocery store and dig up some fishy friends.

do you like anchovies?

confessions [and some conclusions]

confession #1: when i'm walking down the street and i throw something into a garbage bin, i often pretend that i'm a spy somehow sending a secret message.
conclusion: i have watched way too many episodes of "alias."

confession #2: i often judge books by their covers, movies by the trailers before them, and people by the books on their shelves, cds in their stereo, and links on their blogs.
conclusion: i'm too lazy to experience things - i want to make up my mind as fast as possible.

confession #3: i really hate it when i get no comments on a post. a lot.
conclusion: i want to know that this isn't meaningless, and apparently meaning is contingent on external affirmation.

confession #4: seeing "the da vinci code" last night upset me more than i thought it would.
conclusion: lies infuriate me, particularly when most people won't take the trouble of finding out the truth.

confession #5: sometimes i think i could fall for a guy solely on the basis of his intelligent and witty contributions to classroom discussions. even if he sat rows and rows in front of me, and i never saw his face.
conclusion: maybe g.mango was right - maybe i would get married for the conversation.

leftovers, forever!

wish i had headphones right now. but, alas.

jon stewart is someone i admire more than i care to admit. suffice it to say, it's a lot. a LOT.

have headphones now. wishes can come true! and, as a result, ross' blog just got funnier, because there are few things i find as amusing as people swearing at dead philosophers. wish i were kidding, but do me a favour and don't hold your breath for that wish to come true.

"how perfect you are, like my hockey scar". skoch makes me wonder about things. sometimes i think our friendship is too good to be true. it's too easy. it's bound for destruction.

"shed a little light" is stuck in my head, again. maybe i should clarify that it's not a depressing song, but kind of an anthem of hope and reflection. because when i quoted only part of it, that may have been alarming.

oh, let us turn our thoughts today to martin luther king
and recognize that there are ties between us
all men and women, living on the earth
ties of hope and love, sister and brotherhood

you know, that reminds me of a quote from jfk . . . sigh:
for in the final analysis, our most basic common link is that we all inhabit this small planet. we all breathe the same air. we all cherish our children's future. and we are all mortal.

earth-shattering? perhaps not. but ideas make my heart sing. because they're beautiful, you see. like geometry.

there's a goal i've had for nearly six years that i've only made infinitesimal progress on. that's boo. also boo? sometimes habits i've kicked threaten to make comebacks. as nav would say, that's getting old.

i just got excited wondering what box number i'll have next year. i've moved from #9 to #12 and i'm hoping to get closer to the front end!

addition to my non-negotiables for potential husband-type figure: able to carve a turkey. 'cause, seriously . . .

PS i wish i was a systematic theologian... they're all so cool.

assorted loves

A. ROMANCE
as part of our continuing pursuit of the official title of most single people on the planet - a goal we take very seriously indeed, i assure you! - my dear friend skoch and i decided to come up with lists of "significant other non-negotiables", to narrow the field as we each search for our soulmates or whatever.

now, skoch's list ain't online yet - i'd be surprised if he's written one down, actually, given how busy he's been with . . . stuff. in any case, i have busily been composing my lists. why the use of the plural, you ask? well, you see, there are various categories of criteria, perhaps more depending on what sort of geek you are. i'm a geek of the highest order, but i still only managed to compose four separate lists. here, then, are two of them:

negotiable:
1) knows the names of all the members of the seaver family, including the foster son
2) can sing any of the four "solos" in the monstar theme song from "space jam"
3) is giddy about greek
4) has read something by victor hugo or jane austen, and doesn't mind talking about it
5) knows pi to seven digits
6) buys flowers for his mom for "no special reason"
7) comes up with a story/joke/question to liven things up when conversations die
8) makes good sand castles
9) knows what the "cone of silence" is
10) regularly quotes: a) invader zim b) st:tng c) "adventures in odyssey"

non-negotiable:
1) knows what captain jean-luc picard's favourite beverage is (swoon if he enjoys it himself)
2) owns the soundtracks to at least five movies
3) plays with numbers for fun (double swoon if he does is without even noticing)
4) knows what the integral of 2(pi)r is, and why it's relevant
5) can rhyme with delicacy and creativity
6) has read "le petit prince" and loved it
7) picks movies to watch based on cast/director/producer/writer, and not plot
8) owns a t-shirt that he "made" himself
9) knows the next three books he plans to read
10) regularly quotes: a) scripture - but only if it's done humorously b) himself c) me

B. FRIENDSHIP
speaking of skoch, back in the fall he started a "band" called "divided". obviously, it's stellar. so, please listen to his stuff. he and josiah are amazing . . . and half the res is involved in their back-up vocals and instrumentation. btw, "joy" is my favourite song. "just a friend" is also super, even though it's pretty much a cover . . . with some uber-interesting edits.

lest you think skoch is the only friend i have (:P) i should mention: lately, my friends have been simply awesome. deniss is one of them. he listens to me and takes me for walks when i'm crying. janet is another one. she tells me when i hurt her and helps me love her better. friends are great.

C. FAMILY

'nuff said.

i'm it . . . but not in a stephen king kind of way

four jobs i've had:
1. receptionist at a spa-type place
2. sandwich artist at subway
3. office help for north york summer music school
4. clown/entertainer for kids' birthday parties
p.s. - i'm serious

four movies i can watch over and over:
1. pride and prejudice - a&e version
2. demolition man
3. thirteen days
4. star trek: first contact

four places i've lived:
1. bucharest, romania
2. peania, greece
3. toronto, ontario
4. calgary, alberta

four t.v. shows i love:
1. friends
2. csi: any version
3. law & order: original or svu
4. simpsons

four places i've vacationed:
1. tenerife, canary islands
2. catskill mountains, new york
3. st. adele, quebec
4. isla mujeres, mexico

four of my favourite dishes:
1. a white one with a pastel rainbow around the rim
2. my shiny black octogonal bowls
3. oh, you mean food? mashed potatoes and steak
4. mandarin chicken salad

four sites i visit daily:
1. hotmail.com
2. rmcmail.com
3. imdb.com
4. this one

four places i'd rather be right now:
1. at home in bed
2. at home on the couch
3. lying under a blanket in the fetal position
4. someplace where the world's not spinning quite so fast

four bloggers i am tagging:
i can't keep track of who's already done this . . . i'm tagging everyone who reads this!

the latest!

confession: i like watching "desperate housewives". it's so well written at times, and i'm very curious to find out why may alice killed herself.

alex said something neat last weekend at the birthday doo - he had watched "alias" once and sensed that it was the kind of show he could really get stuck on. he then made a point never to watch it again. in other words, the seductive nature of the show convinced him that he shouldn't watch it.

i know i'm stuck on tv. there are at least half-a-dozen shows i really like to watch. and when you're alone so much of the time, it's the easiest way to cover up the silence. BUT i am making a few commitments:

#1 - i will, in fact, read my bible for at least 10 minutes a day. i'm praying about where to start.
#2 - i will, in fact, spend at least 10 minutes a day praying for my "person of the day" and my "cause of the day" - i'm making a list of seven people and seven "issues" and assigning them each a day of the week. that way, i have to be disciplined about setting aside time, and not only praying as things come up (although that's great, too)
#3 - i will, in fact, spend about 20 minutes a day on my bike. pedalling.
#4 - i will, in fact, keep reading books.

i read the first ("the mysterious affair at styles") and last (curtain: poirot's last case") poirot mysteries this weekend, and am now getting into jules verne's "the mysterious island", upon dad's recommendation. think "lord of the flies" but with five adults and a dog. speaking of poirot, i've decided to buy them in order, one or two a month, until i have all 39. $400 later, i'll have every harper collins poirot mystery there is. i've been meaning to find myself a collection, and this seems a good one, since i find agatha christie to be no less than brilliant and - can i just say - the harper collins book covers are simply gorgeous:















so . . . if anyone is wondering how to randomly surprise me with a gift, this is the way to go :) i also accept gift cards.

any other goal suggestions?

um

ought i to find it disturbing that i had incredibly vivid and horrifying dreams about what zoey bartlet's kidnappers might have done to her over the 36 hours that she was missing? i'm talking about "the west wing."

yeah, shut up.

no, seriously. i never have bad dreams and now first i can't fall asleep at night and, all of a sudden, knives and pain and stuff.

grr.

go away, bad dream, boo!