picture this

2009...

it was to be a year of weddings, renewed friendships, goodbyes, and hellos...

cori got married and we danced.

i finished my course work and carried an orange balloon.

i turned 28 and made an awesome cake.

i went to the bahamas and studied for the lsat.

i went to collingwood and played on the swings with nancy and pat.

i said goodbye to cori and made her a cake.

mon got married and we danced.

i got my lsat score and nearly wept with joy.

i went all out for hallowe'en but no one else did!

while on a research trip, i commemorated the 20th anniversary of the fall of the berlin wall.

i celebrated the holidays with more "family" than ever before - friends so close they're family, my little sister's in-laws, distant cousins in london, my little sister, her husband, and my parents. and i missed my older sister and her fiance.

there was a lot more in there... new ideas, new areas of research, major life decisions (like applying to law school), terrible disappointments (the detainee allegations and the recent proroguing of parliament rank high, but there were personal ones, too). but there was growth. and there were good tears.

not bad for a year's work. on to the next!

fa la la la la!

out with the old year,
in with the new!
january's nearly here,
december's nearly through!
though we don't know where the time has flown,
it obviously flew... so

out with the old year,
out with the old year,
out with the old year,
in with the new!

fa la la la lalalalala,
fa la la la la!

~"out with the old year," from the "adventures in odyssey" christmas album

merry, merry

a warm merry christmas to all my readers... all seven of you. a special cup of cheer for michelle, amanda, ab., and cori, who are among the most faithful blog-visitors (and friends) i know.

holly and ivy,
~m

london sweets

the best hot chocolate i've ever had, trafalgar square

anna's christmas cookies

german mini pancakes, south bank of the thames

anna's pavlova (mmmm...)

glasses

madonna and child (me and eddie).

christmas gift (w)rap

it's christmas eve and woe is me,
gotta do some shoppin' in a big hurry,
gotta make a list, gotta check it twice,
gotta read the ads, gotta ask advice
better start right now, better start today,
gonna be in trouble if i delay,
just look outside at all that snow,
got the christmas spirit
HO HO HO!

gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop -
shop-doo-op!

look in my wallet, what do i see,
empty space staring back at me.
check my pockets, news is bad,
can't go shoppin' 'til i talk to dad.
ask him nice for a little loan,
some collateral to call my own,
then FA LA LA, i'm out of here,
to spread a little christmas cheer!

gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop -
shop-doo-op!

how 'bout a watch for my brother bob,
he's always late for his downtown job,
a fruitcake for my aunt eileen,
she's a REAL fruitcake if you know what i mean,
there's mom and dad, and uncle smitty,
and all those cousins in kansas city,
the list gets longer, every day,
jing-jing-jingle, i'm on my way!

gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop -
shop-doo-op!

hurry home to wrap and tie,
st. nick will be here by and by,
pile those presents on the floor,
light the tree and lock the door,
tiptoe off to fall in bed,
sugarplums dancing in my head,
can't wait 'til christmas comes, but then
i can't wait 'til i go shopping again!

gotta shop, shop,

gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop, shop,
gotta shop -
shop-doo-op!



~ huron street public school christmas pageant, 1991

corina and i can still recite most of this by heart :)

solo?

there's an important distinction between a monologue and a soliloquy. the former is an extended uninterrupted speech by one person, while the latter is similar, but not intended to be heard by any of the other characters. it's addressed only to the (passive) audience. it's hamlet's "to be or not to be" rather than, say, emilio's speech about how he ended up in detention in "the breakfast club" (which i just saw!). hamlet was just talking to himself, working through ideas outloud, but the jock was actually communicating. i mean, yes, he was working through stuff, but he also wanted the rest of the crew to know. and he wanted them to respond.

if you're asked to recite a monologue, either kind will do. but when you're writing a blog... you have to kind of decide which kind of "performance" it's going to be. for the record, i don't want this to be a soliloquy.

ok?

capital/capitol

things you need to know about me, if you don't already:

1 - i'm insanely into "the west wing."
2 - the only time i've ever been to washington dc, i hung out with the older sissy, but never saw the sights.
3 - united airlines flies to heathrow through dc.
4 - i don't know how to sight-see by myself. it's hard to stay motivated and to know what to do... and i always wish i had someone to talk to about what i see.
5 - my thesis work revolves around the vietnam war.

with some help from my expedia-expert (i.e. dad), a 13-hour layover was planned. the benefit of this particular trip was that it was so short that it could only allow for a whirlwind tour. in other words, i had no choice but to stay motivated. it also demanded some triage.

i focused on the national archives, the lincoln memorial, and the vietnam war memorial. i also broke down and got a reader card at the library of congress. ("broke down" because they really discourage getting the card unless you intend to do research. in all fairness, i would have done so if i had the time.)

apart from the coincidence of seeing an enlisted soldier at the vietnam war memorial, my favourite thing was discovering that one of my tour bus drivers (taking advantage of the freedom to hop-on-hop-off, i met four different ones) was a vietnam vet. he was in grad school and got a student deferment, but then he ran out of money. so he enlisted and flew fighter planes! then he moved to d.c. in '73. i know vets abound, especially in the states, and especially when it comes to this particular war... but it was still kinda neat.

globu, globu!

my chubby fingers reached for the christmas ornament and mom tentatively placed the shiny sphere in my hand. within seconds, it was on the ground, in pieces. to this day, whenever i reach for something delicate, i hear mom’s singsong voice: globu, globu! it reminds me that, as a two-year-old, i begged for and was entrusted with a treasure, only to fail miserably as its steward.

the 26-year gap between that christmas and today seems to have done little to shake the feeling that i cannot handle the fragile. it is enough to make me hesitate before i reach out. i pause for a moment and consider: can't i enjoy this beautiful thing without touching it, without risking it? perhaps i can relish it by observation, rather than experience. we will both be safer that way.

even the things i love most – especially the things i love most – i am bound to be too aggressive with, to smother, to crush. my fingers are not nimble enough, my grip is too tight, and i find myself counting down to the inevitable disappointment of loss.

~ adapted from my "soul paper," 2004.

where the brilliant ideas are...

in case it wasn't intuitively obvious from my last post, i've been spending a whole lot of time working at a coffee shop lately. namely, a starbucks at a certain chapters near my house.

sometimes i feel guilty about being here: at first, i would get a (vanilla rooibos, loose-leaf in a bag!) tea in the morning, ask to have it topped up with more hot water a few hours later, then have a snack or lunch, and finally a (vanilla rooibos, loose-leaf in a bag!) tea latte in the afternoon. then i started bringing my lunch and snack from home. they let me stay, which i really appreciate. (for all i know, the staff is just uncomfortable asking people to please spend more than $7 if they're going to hang out all day and use their power outlets.) in any case, it works out well for me, but i feel awful when people are lookin' for a place to sit.

incidentally, even $7 a day (plus transit) isn't cheap. if you click on the ads on the left, you can help me pay for my "office"! :) i'll even put a little sign on my table that says, "paid for, in part, by..." i swear i will.

the thing is, i get work done at an alarming rate when i'm here! there are fewer distractions and i only have internet access for 2 hours. plus, the very act of getting up and out of the house helps put me in the right frame of mind for productivity. (fact: i could never be self-employed.) listening to "glee" constantly also seems to help. it's predictable (there are only twenty tracks, at this point) and cheerful. my mom actually describes the show as my way of recovering from hours and hours of being immersed in the gory details of the vietnam war and the infuriating selfishness of certain corners of the mennonite and united churches.

she may have a point. it's hard to be too upset about tiger cages when you're listening to this:


what helps you get work done?