undeserved

sometimes things go really really well for me all of a sudden. not everything is perfect - don't get me wrong. but a lot of things are very good. and i very much like that. and i'm very aware of Whose "fault" it is.

i'm leaving toronto in three and a half weeks. and that's sad, exciting, scary, and encouraging. i wonder what my life would be like if i stayed. if friendships were allowed to deepen and i had to make commitments here - to a faith community, to a school, to a home. i don't live out of a suitcase, and haven't ever, but i'm kinda rootless. at this point i have to wonder what things would be like if i put down deep roots somewhere. here. in calgary. wherever.

in fact, how *can* you make today count without making some commitments . . . at least a few? not just to values and ideals, but to people, i mean.

if i weren't leaving in three weeks . . . what would happen?