this just in

i think about fresh starts around this time of year: "this year, my relationship with so-and-so will be better - i'll be more understanding and willing to listen" or "this year, i'll be more diligent about work" or "this year, calories won't exist" or whatever. the new year holds such promise - it feels fragile and unspoilt and precious. i imagine that's why babies have traditionally been the mascots for this day. it's a new beginning, a clean slate. tabula rasa, as it were. and then i read something like this:

what has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun. is there anything of which one can say, "look! this is something new"?
~ ecclesiastes 1:9-10

to be honest, that rings true: i feel like i'm the same mara i was a few days ago. i'll probably make some similar mistakes this year as last because, truth be told, 2006 hasn't ushered in new and glorious heights of integrity and compassion and enlightenment. so, maybe nothing changes. maybe these crazy milestones are just intended to give us some euphoric inspiration, so we can summon up whatever will-power we have and try to be more. that's what resolutions seem to be all about . . . and we *will* fail because - if you haven't learned it from personal experience, maybe you've heard it from dr. phil - will-power doesn't work. so, that's a bit of a downer.

if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!
~ 2 corinthians 5:17

i wish i could go back in time and whisper in the ear of the teacher who wrote ecclesiastes. i wish i could say, "you ain't seen nothing yet!" God, after all, is alive!!! and His title of "Creator" isn't a statement of historical function - it's integral to His very being. God is constantly active in the world, creating. God is constantly active in *me*, creating. (incidentally, He doesn't do that by destroying the old, but by redeeming it. which is cool, and important, but not the primary point at the moment.)

when i look back carefully, i know i'm new. the changes aren't simply cosmetic, either: it's not simply that i now wear a cross around my neck, or carry a church pen in my pursue, or have a strange fascination with greek. this wasn't plastic surgery - it was a heart transplant. and it wasn't a one-shot deal that took place when i knelt down for the first time and prayed, "i am Yours", either. He keeps creating in my life. i don't have to look too far to see examples of God's on-going work: the past four months have involved a lot of painful and wonderful growth for me in areas i assumed would lie dormant forever. it turns out, barren wombs can be opened, the dead can be raised, and God can create a great deal out of nothing! out of dust, in fact.

this is my prayer: do it again, Lord. let me be the setting for Your newness. create in me, for Your glory. the year is new - will you be, too?

because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. they are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. i say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore i will wait for Him."
~ lamentations 3:22-24